Month: January 2007

Over the years, I’ve accumulated tons of RPG stuff that I’m not only never going to play, but really don’t see me ever needing to reference at all. So, I’ve decided to get rid of a bunch of it.

None of this is going to eBay or anything — it’s just not worth the effort. So, I figured that I’d give folks who read this journal first crack at the list. Anything that doesn’t get sold will be boxed and taken to Half-price Books, where I’m sure I will get 20 cents per pound.

I’m not looking at making huge bucks here. If there’s anything you want, make me an offer (preferably that covers shipping and handling), and it’s yours.

EDIT: I’ve removed the items that have already been spoken for — check the revised list.

The list is huge, so it’s here behind the cut.

I’ve been reading ‘s copy of Qin: The Warring States, the english translation of a french RPG: A wuxia-genre game set in China’s warring states period.

I need to get a copy of this game. First of all, it’s gorgeous. Second, it is pretty much the best wuxia-genre RPG I’ve read….supplanting even Rebecca Borgstrom’s brilliant Weapons of the Gods. WOTG is detailed and amazing, but Qin manages to pull off the same level of setting and genre detail with a rules system that I find far more elegant and evocative. Character stats based on the 5 Chinese elements, a game system that allows for over-the-top kung fu, and a magic system that replicates alchemy, sorcery and more.

I’m getting an itch to do something with Qin — although not using the standard wuxia setting out-of-the-box. I’m thinking that this system would be a great choice for me to explore an idea that I’ve had — a “genre mash-up” fantasy. Whereas most fantasy uses medieval/dark-ages Europe as its foundation, my nameless idea uses a mix of the American western and Chinese wuxia, perhaps with a few other kitchen-sink genre elements thrown in for spice.

Not sure if anything will come of it, but this nifty RPG is perfect for exploration of the idea, if nothing else.

They say that cancer changes your life. Truth behind that cliche, and lots of it.

It’s not so much that life changes, as that you do. Inside.

Bad day — there’s a fucking hole in my leg. Hurts. Other leg missing a layer of skin. Hurts, too.

Every day I discover something else that has changed. The no-sun-EVER order from my oncologist means no more performing at Faire. OK, fine. I was ready for that. Last night, while watching the opening of the SAG awards, the impact of that sunk in — for the first time, I no longer have an outlet for dramatic performance. I was getting paid for stage performances before I left high school. I went into college with the dead-set assumption that I was going to be an actor. Faire was a sad remnant of that desire, and now it’s gone for me.

Priorities are in a fucking blender. Nothing feels important.

Can’t write, can’t get back to work….climbing the fucking walls here at home, but not healed enough to go anywhere.

Things that I want to say to people. Some of it related to how they’ve acted around me since I’ve been dealing with this. I avoid doing so, because I haven’t got the energy for the drama. It seems so fucking trivial.

(But then again, when the first thing you want to do on the day after I’ve been diagnosed is tell me your side of boyfriend-related LJ drama, and when I seem disinterested because *I’ve just been told I have fucking cancer,* your reaction is to say “look at me. This is important….” Well, maybe being told how badly you’re fucking up is exactly what is needed here. Who knows. Nothing else has woken you up.)

Others have become angels. Still others are hestitant, and look at me like I might break. It’s all very strange.

…and all of it, whirling, constantly, behind my eyes. I feel simultaneously like a drama queen, guilty for my emotional excesses….and yet completely justified in being traumatized. I just don’t fucking know.

Hell, I’ll probably end up deleting this.