Only Terrorists Pay Off Their Debts, Apparently….

The Department of Homeland Security opened an investigation on a retired Texas schoolteacher…..for paying down his credit card.

The schoolteacher and his wife paid a hefty chunk of their credit card balance [$6,522], and then checked online to see if their account had been credited. They learned that the check had arrived, but the amount available for credit on their account hadn’t changed. They called to see what the problem was.

They were told, as they moved up the managerial ladder at the call center, that the amount they had sent in was much larger than their normal monthly payment—and if the increase hits a certain percentage higher than that normal payment, Homeland Security has to be notified.

For paying off your credit card.

7 Replies to “Only Terrorists Pay Off Their Debts, Apparently….”

  1. Weird! I wonder if this is why the large credit card payment I made a few months ago took so long to register? How is it a national threat to pay your debts?

  2. Paying off your debts undermines the economy. How else are those credit card companies going to keep collecting the 25%-32% interest on your debts (which they can then put into giant compensation packages for the corporate bigwigs, while out-sourcing daily operations to India for pennies on the dollar)? Paying off your debts? Why do you hate America?

  3. A sudden increase in spending can be an indicator that you’ve acquired a new source of income. That could be from crime, or it might be from a foreign power, or a terrorist organization. That said, it does feel like a tenous reason to investigate private citizens in a free society. I guess the thinking is that terrorists can recruit private citizens as well as people in more powerful positions. Still feels wierd.

  4. Cut your hair, hippie! (snicker)

    Because if we pay off our debts, the terrorists win.
    Then we can all drive Canyoneros!

    “Can you name the truck with four wheel drive,
    smells like a steak and seats thirty-five..

    Canyonero! Canyonero!

    Well, it goes real slow with the hammer down,
    It’s the country-fried truck endorsed by a clown!

    Canyonero! (Yah!) Canyonero!
    [Krusty:] Hey Hey

    The Federal Highway commission has ruled the
    Canyonero unsafe for highway or city driving.


    12 yards long, 2 lanes wide,
    65 tons of American Pride!

    Canyonero! Canyonero!

    Top of the line in utility sports,
    Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts!

    Canyonero! Canyonero! (Yah!)

    She blinds everybody with her super high beams,
    She’s a squirrel crushing, deer smacking, driving machine!

    Canyonero!-oh woah, Canyonero! (Yah!)

    Drive Canyonero!

    Woah Canyonero!


  5. It’s a possible symptom of money laundering. Same reason bills over $100 were retired and bank transactions over $10,000 are reported to the DEA, likewise folks who pay cash for immediate round trip air faire and don’t check luggage are flagged as suspected drug couriers.

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