Obama Defends “Creationist Psycho Bitch” Remark

(Spotted on Angus’ journal) From the UK’s version of The Onion, The Daily Mash:


DEMOCRATIC candidate Barak Obama last night claimed he was quoted out of context after describing Governor Sarah Palin as a ‘creationist psycho bitch’.


‘Less fuckable than a dead pig’

He dismissed the ‘phoney outrage’ of the Republican camp, insisting the remark was not intended to do anything other than draw attention to Governor Palin’s insane beliefs and ugly, bitch-like qualities.

Senator Obama said: "I was simply implying what a stupid, horrible, terrifying freak she is. I can’t help it if people decide to take that literally.

"I was using a metaphor to make the important point that if you want another four years of psychotic, blood thirsty creationists who love sucking the oil industry’s big fat cock, then vote for my opponents."

He added: "I did then go on to say that if Jesus came down from heaven and told me I would have to fuck either Sarah Palin or a pig, you’d have to drag me off the pig.

"Now that doesn’t mean I’m comparing Governor Palin to a pig. What I am saying is that if it’s a straight choice between Governor Palin and a pig, I’m fucking the pig.

"If I then went on to say that I’d rather fuck a dead pig than Governor Palin, that should not be construed in any way as a personal attack."

Senator Obama refused to apologise to the Governor, insisting it would take too long to translate the words into her ‘retarded hillbilly language’.

Ferguson on the Election

Craig Ferguson, who became an American citizen earlier this year, had some brilliant election commentary on his Late Late Show monologue last night.

Check it out. It’s worth watching.

Sometimes, it takes an immigrant to crystalize for people exactly what it means to be an American.