9 Replies to “Yikes.”

  1. I’ll make a small wager on the following:

    According to a year-end AP poll (1999), one in four Americans believe that the Second Coming of Christ will occur in 2000.

    According to a year-end AP poll (2000), one in four Americans believe that the Second Coming of Christ will occur in 2001.

    According to a year-end AP poll (2001), one in four Americans believe that the Second Coming of Christ will occur in 2002.

    According to a year-end AP poll (2002), one in four Americans believe that the Second Coming of Christ will occur in 2003.

    According to a year-end AP poll (2003), one in four Americans believe that the Second Coming of Christ will occur in 2004.

    According to a year-end AP poll (2004), one in four Americans believe that the Second Coming of Christ will occur in 2005.

    According to a year-end AP poll (2005), one in four Americans believe that the Second Coming of Christ will occur in 2006.

    BUT I’ll also wager it’s approximately the same 25% each time. So at least we know who they are and can ignore them appropriately.

  2. Actually, he came back in mid-2005, but was arrested while attending an anti-war rally and sent to Guantanamo Bay. While being waterboarded in order to discover the true depths of Islamofascist sympathies, his “Guest Relations Specialist” was reportedly overheard to say “Jesus, eh? Try walking on this, bitch!” Jesus then entered into a hypoxia-induced coma from which he has yet to emerge.

    I’m just waiting for the day when “Christians” will learn to read the fucking Bible for themselves:
    “Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh.”
    -Matthew 24:44

    I haven’t been to church in over a year and rarely read the Bible and even I know that part.

    Oh wait, silly me. That passage doesn’t say anything about smiting Sodomites. How could I forget that Christianists overlook all those inconvenient parts of that Bible that don’t directly deal with man ass.

  3. Well, we can only hope. Imagine if we were rid of 25% of the population! And the dumbest of the lot, at that.

    Now that would be one fine rapture.

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